Idol Top 8: My Take (It or Leave It)

Work is insane! Work is insane! I should totally be working! But I'm stealing five minutes to post about Idol's top 8.

Danny: I forsee a red-hot future in the contemporary Christian genre for you, my friend. Love your voice, love your glasses, probably won't love the album you are sure to make even if you don't win Idol.

Scott: Dude, that was just bad. Bad song, bad guitar, bad singing. Bad. Bottom three.

Lil: I'm glad to know the backstory on your name, but sharing that information did not help your performance. You can sing, but you need to pull yourself together. Bottom three this week for you.

Anoop: I need to learn that if I think you're going to be awful, you're great and if I think you're going to be great, you're awful. When I heard you were doing "True Colors," my first thought was, "This cannot go well." Ha! How wrong I was! I loved it, although I found your sweater way distracting.

Allison: You are amazing. I could not agree more with the judges, though, that you need to find a way to connect with the voters in order to continue on in this competition. Contestants like you make me wish America voted against people rather than for them. I don't think people would vote to get you off the show, but not enough people pick up the phone to keep you on. My fingers are crossed that you make it through to the end.

Kris: What did you sing? Was it good? I can't even remember, I find you so boring.

Matt: What did you sing? Was it good? I can't even remember, I find you so boring.

Adam: Your performance gave me chills. It was beautiful and haunting and an absolutely perfect song for you.

So I predict Lil, Scott, and . . . um, someone else for the bottom three. Don't I have an awesome crystal ball?

Yawn.

Something happened to me over the past few weeks. I feel like all the interesting just got sucked right out of me. I'm not sure why. I'm not unhappy. I've done many fun things and enjoyed them. Maddie and Riley have been great—hilarious and generally well behaved. Sure, work is a drag, the condo hasn't sold, and I'm all kinds of behind on all kinds of projects, but all that's the norm.

In any case, my lack of interesting is the reason for my lack of posts. The Lack of Interesting Phenomenon (LOIP) began right around the time that Jillian Michaels started trying to kill me. Perhaps there is a correlation there. I have to say, over the past couple of weeks, I've done the 30-Day Shred most nights, and I even tried Level 2 (of 3) for the first time yesterday. I give the workout two thumbs up, although I was so sore the first two nights I did it that I had trouble sleeping because my aching muscles were keeping me awake. (By night three, it occurred to me that I could take Tylenol before bed, but by then, I was on the mend.) Anyway, this in and of itself is not interesting, but it's what I've been doing with my time.

In other News of the Not Interesting, my moms of twins club had its semi-annual tag sale this past weekend. I love this sale. This was the fourth or fifth sale that I've worked. It's a big commitment to price and tag all of the stuff you want to sell, lug it to the sale location, help set up the ngiht before, then work the whole day of the sale. It's worth it, though, on so many levels. For one, it's a great social outlet. On setup night and the day of the sale, I got to see lots of friends from the club who I otherwise rarely get to see in person. I also get to enjoy social time while working the day of the sale since my usual job is cashier. I love to see what people buy and have the inside line on how much (or little) of my stuff is selling. Best of all, though, is that sellers get to shop before the general public. Not only do we get first pick of the stuff, but we don't have to deal with the huge crowds; more than 700 people attended this past weekend's event. I had scoped out two little Maddie and Riley sized bikes with training wheels during setup and figured they'd be great birthday gifts. Unfortunately, I was aced out and someone beat me to them. Ah, well. C'est la vie, and I found plenty of other good stuff: floor puzzles, a few items of clothing, and a couple of Pack'n'Plays for Maddie and Riley's daycare, and bike helmets which the kids like so much I almost don't think we need the bikes to go with them.

All of this is leading up to something that is sure to bring more Interesting back to my life: asking the good people of the Internet for advice. Getting advice from the Internet is always Interesting, right? Maddie and Riley will be three in June. They have tricycles, which they are able to ride with varying degrees of skill; Maddie is pretty proficient, and Riley is proficient if proficient is defined by "very good at going in reverse, but totally unable to go forward." I heard from a few moms at the yard sale that bicycles are acutally easier for some kids than tricycles because of the position of the pedals, and between that and the fact that Maddie and Riley are OBSESSED wtih bikes, I think I (and by I, I mean their grandparents) would like to get them two-wheelers for their birthday. (We're finally almost to the questions.) Here's what I want to know (and yes, I know a bike shop could tell me all this , but that would not be nearly as Interesting as asking my good readers):

1. I've seen Dora-branded toddler bikes at Target and I know I could get a "real" bike at a bike shop. What are people's opinions on the quality/price break? I don't want to spend a million dollars since they will likely not use these bikes for more than a season or two before needing bigger ones, but I (a) want them to be safe and (b) don't want something that's just going to be a pile of loose screws and missing parts in a week. Brand recommendations? Price points?

2. What about balance bikes like the Skuut? Anyone have experience with those? The concept seems great and they are billed as being good for ages 2–5, so in theory Maddie and Riley could get two years of good use out of them and then be ready for a "real" bike. But are the balance bikes everything they claim to be?

Input appreciated! Make my life Interesting again!

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I have been watching Idol this season and have been meaning to do weekly updates as I did last season, but social obligations have kept me from being a super-regular watcher and work obligations and LOIP have kept me from being a super-regular blogger. For what it's worth, though, here are my thoughts on the Top 9:

Megan Joy: I'M SO GLAD YOU GOT VOTED OFF. Your crazy dancing was driving me nuts, and I think you might be insane. Beautiful, but insane.

Danny: I love you, Danny Gokey. That is all.

Adam: You, sir, can sing. That is all.

Lil Rounds: You have not hit your stride. I'm not sure if it's poor song choice or nerves or what, but I really hope you break out of whatever shell it is that's surrounding you and blow us all away one of these weeks soon or I fear we'll be saying goodbye to you.

Kris and Matt: You are both boring to me. That is all.

Allison: Sixteen? Really? Um, wow. I don't think you have the fan base to win, but you are amazing and I hope this experience ramps up your self-confidence, which is the only thing I think you lack.

Anoop: I don't think you're the best singer, but I love me a geeky guy, ergo, I love you. That is all.

Scott: You remind me of That Guy Everyone Knew in College, the one who could sit down at the piano in the dorm lounge and play old Billy Joel with great skill and charm and about whom everyone felt fondly. You're talented, and I think you're one of the smartest contestants Idol has ever seen. But I'm not convinced you're one of the best.

Who are the rest of you loving this season? Hating? Who do you think is going to go all the way?

Idol FInale: My Take (It or Leave It)

Yesterday was all kinds of screwed up for me. I wasn't at work most of the day because I had to be at home waiting for National Grid to come install a new gas meter at my house. Their window for when I should be home? Noon to six. Thanks for narrowing that down, guys, thanks a lot. At first I was all annoyed about it, but then it occurred to me that I would have to be at home. By myself. Just waiting around.

Oh, darn.

I haven't had that much alone time at home in a good long while, and I really enjoyed it. I enjoyed it so much, in fact, that I neglected to do a few of the things I had meant to do, such as blog about Idol. So here are my belated thoughts.

The Davids were my favorites for most of the season. (Well, them and Hottie McHotterson, Michael Johns, but alas, we had to say goodbye too soon.) I was ultra-excited about the finale because never in my Idol-watching career have my two faves gone head-to-head at the end.

I really enjoyed Tuesday's show. I thought that Clive Davis picked great songs for both contestants and loved both of their first performances. Here's my question, though: why can't the contestants ever pick good songs for themselves? When they are given the choice of anything—anything!—they want to sing, I find that they usually make odd and poor choices. What gives? That's my long-winded, semi-rhetorical way of saying that I thought the second two performances were not as strong for either of the D's, although I did love hearing Little D do "Imagine" again.

So after the show, I was sure that David A. was going to win. I thought he had stronger performances overall and was guaranteed such a slew of teenage girl voters that he had it clinched. I think both contestants were—are—equally talented in different ways, but I thought that Archuleta had it all sewn up.

Last night, I settled in with some friends for lots of food (spinach/artichoke dip, Chinese, cookies, ice cream, Gio's Soon-to-Be-Famous Spiked Strawberry Lemonade) and had a blast watching last night's results show. The highlight was David Cook's Guitar Hero ad. Awesome. Low point: that endless, dirge-like, George Michael song. Good lord that song was BORING. And those glasses! He looked like some kind of fly. Amanda Overmyer was also a lowlight. In all of the group performances, she looked so pissed off about the drudgery of having to appear on the results show. Boo-hoo for her. 

Of course the real highlight was when it was announced that David Cook had won. I was truly surprised, and excited, and he looked so genuinely overwhelmed and happy. I love that his mom and brother came up on stage, and how clearly thrilled he was to see his family. And I love the confetti that comes out of the ceiling! I know that sounds goofy, but it's so fun! 

And now, no more Idol until January. Boo-hoo. Alas, 'twas a great way to end Season 7, I have to say.

Idol Top 3: My Take (It or Leave It)

I took the moral high road and had dinner with my in-laws after the kids went to bed, but I still managed to see the second and third round of performances as they happened last night and to find the first round on YouTube before I went to bed. From the looks of things, Round 1 was the strongest set by far, so I'm bummed that I missed it live, but so be it. Here are my thoughts:

David A.: I thought "And So It Goes" was the best thing you've done since "Imagine." Kudos to Paula for picking such a perfect song for you. (Full disclosure: I absolutely adore that song.) Your song pick? Forgettable. What was it again? See? And the Dan Fogelberg? Before Simon even made his comments, I turned to my friend and said, "Why did they pick a song that makes a seventeen-year-old kid sound like an old fogey?" So one great, two OK, and we'll see you next week for the Battle of the Davids.

Syesha: I actually didn't watch your Round 1 on YouTube because I didn't care. I thought "Fever" was fine. That's what I always say about you: fine. Frankly, I was distracted during "Fever" by how short and transparent  your dress was. There was a lot of backlighting shining through that silvery skirt. The song the producers chose for you was awful, although your performance was . . . fine. Fine is not going to cut it this week. You're gone.

David C.: I liked 'em all. Even if David A. wins it all with the teenybopper vote, you're poised to make a great record. Your creativity didn't come through as much on this round, but your performances were solid and enjoyable. 

Bring on the Battle of the Davids! I can't wait. I will be *pissed* if there is some upset and Syesha is around next week. In fact, I was so worried about that possibility that for the first time ever, I voted last night, twice. Once for Archuleta, once for Cook. I did my part. Let's see what happens tonight. Hopefully I'll be home from book club in time to catch the end of the results show.

"Earth's Last Eden"? Really?

I've never watched Survivor, but I might have to start next season. It was just announced that Survivor: Gabon—Earth's Last Eden will begin filming in late June. Having spent three years there in the Peace Corps, I know from personal experience that Gabon is a gorgeous, lush, tropical country. But Earth's Last Eden? I'm not so sure. Guess the producers need some media hype to get everyone excited about a country virtually no one in the U.S. has ever heard of.

As for Jeff Probst's comment in the EW article that "no one has really hung out there," what the hell is he talking about? He must mean no one from the Survivor crew, because plenty of other people have hung out there and could give him some ideas on what to expect in terms of wildlife. Sheesh, Jeff, do a little research already.

On the subject of reality TV, my in-laws are in town this week for my father-in-law to attend a medical conference. They are coming over tonight to see the kids. And me, I guess. I might have to miss Idol! For the second week in a row! Tragedy.

No one needs an editor like an editor.

Many thanks to a good friend who pointed out the (now corrected) egregious typo in yesterday's post welcoming new readers. Nothing like a professional wordsmith greeting thousands of new visitors with a fourth-grade mistake in her first line! It's oh-so-very-true that no one needs an editor like an editor.

I have to say that I have never felt this popular in my life. I was seriously geeky in high school (played oboe in wind ensemble and youth orchestra, presided over the French club, worked at the local candy store/ice cream shop, never drank anything stronger than Diet Coke . . . you know the type). I'm still geeky, but I feel like a popular geek. So many nice people are sending me e-mails and inviting me to be friends on Facebook and leaving me comments. I'm really flattered. And it's also going to take me a while to get back to people. So if you've sent me a message or an friend request or an invitation to play Scrabulous, be patient. I'll respond. But it might not be today or this week.

I have a 20-minute commute to work in greater Boston, mostly on the freeway. Anyone who has driven in greater Boston will appreciate the fact that the drivers on my commute often cause me to question the decency of humanity. All of the amazing support I've gotten over the years I've had my blog and in the past couple of days from the CNN article are a reminder that most people are nice, good folks. It's comforting.

There's got to be a transition here, but I'm not yet caffeinated enough to make it. In the realm of the no-longer-popular, bye-bye Jason Castro on Idol. America got that one right. We're on our way to Battle of the Davids. Will Cook or Archuleta triumph? Vegas-style odds have them in an dead heat.

EDITED TO ADD: Good lord, I am like a caricature of myself. The same eagle-eyed friend alerted me to a typo (now corrected) in today's posting. I'm good at my job, I really am. I promise. I swear!

Idol Top 4: My Take (It or Leave It)

A friend of mine was visiting from out of town last night, ergo I missed Idol. I really love this friend a lot. So I've spent my morning watching the performances on YouTube. God bless the digital age is all I have to say.

I wasn't super-excited about the theme (legends of rock), but I thought the contestants made some pretty good choices.

Jason: It's true, it wasn't great. But I actually didn't think it was nearly as bad as the judges did. It was the usual college coffee-house sentimental. You're gone this week or next. Should be this week, but the screaming gaggle of girl voters in your fan base might have the numbers to keep you around.

Syesha: You, too, are gone this week or next. You were fine. You were better than fine. But I just can't get really into you.

David C: OMGOMGOMG, you did NOT just do "Hungry Like the Wolf." OMG. I'm ashamed to admit that Duran Duran was pretty much my reason for living in sixth and seventh grades. And in college, I saw them live in Germany in this tiny little club and I was standing on the John Taylor side of the stage and Simon Le Bon was wearing velour stretch pants and OMG WOW. Oh, wait, this is supposed to be about David Cook. Right. Yes. It was fine. It was solid. It was not that different from the original, just more growly. Rar. As for your other song, I'm not a big Who fan, and I actually didn't know the song. I thought you were good, though—definitely Top 2 material, and clearly just plain talented.

David A.: I just love you. Whenever you sing, I am filled with maternal pride even though you are not my kid. "Hot mad vocals" is right. What else is there to say?

I really, really hope we get a Battle of the Davids for the final. Then I can be happy no matter who wins!

Bye-bye, Brooke.

No more Brooke White on Idol. I think that Jason should have been the one to go, but he's a cute, young boy, so there you have it. It really is a popularity contest, not so much a singing contest, although it's true that I don't think any of the folks who have been sent home were destined to win. Some of them have just not been sent home in order of talent, or rather, lack thereof. Jason's time draws near, although I think his fan base is bigger than Syesha's, so perhaps he'll make the top three. We'll see.

Legends of Rock next week. I'm not super-excited about that theme, but the upside is that it will give David Cook a chance to really shine and it will challenge David Archuleta, Jason, and Syesha.

Anyone out there (other than What A Card, who I already know is a fan) watch So You Think You Can Dance? I'm already feeling sad about Idol season drawing to a close and I'm considering watching SYTYCD in its place.

Idol Top 5: My Take (It or Leave It)

Thanks to my friend Keen for the link to a hilarious article at the Washington Post about last night's Idol. Their summary is much better than mine—especially the goodness about Hannah Montana deflowering David Archuleta (don't say I didn't warn you!)—but I'll still give you my recap.

OK, first of all: NEIL NIGHT ON IDOL. And they each sang two songs! Awesome. Second of all: absolutely none of my predictions/requests were correct. Take my crystal ball away now. Third of all: Paula Abdul gets crazier each week! Fourth of all: I wish the show could have been 1.5 hours as it felt really, really rushed to cram the performances and judging into an hour.

Here are my thoughts, going out to OTRgirl of Sojournering and her husband Jrex, who I have turned into fans despite themselves. I revel in my power.

Jason: Why did you not choose to perform Red, Red Wine? For the past couple of weeks, your song choices have been weak and you've shown a kind of rude innocence about the theme. Last week you didn't know that Cats was about cats, this week you brought the wrong lyrics to your session with Neil . . . pull yourself together! Sloppy. Bottom two.

Brooke: "I'm a Believer" gave me flashbacks to Kristy Lee Cook's awful Beatles-go-country performance. Eek! And your shiny blue pants scared me. That said, I loved your version of "I Am, I Said." I'm a little embarrassed to admit that it made me tear up a little.

David C.: I did not know either of the songs you chose, but I sure liked your performances of them. There's really nothing left to say about you. You're definitely bound for the top two, and likely to win it all.

David A.: Yes, you're a little Disney and yes, choosing "America" gave me another Kristy Lee Cook flashback, but I cannot help myself! I love you! And let's face it, Disney or not, your voice is amazing and your musical timing impeccable. You have a way of holding on to notes just a little longer than I think you should, but then coming off them and making the phrasing something really dramatic and emotional. I see you in the top two as well (battle of the Davids!), and with your huge teenage girl fan base, you could take home the gold.

Syesha: The same, always the same. Good—very good, even—but nothing that has ever moved me. Bottom two, especially after the influential Mr. Cowell pronounced that you were "in danger."

FINALLY!

Neil night on Idol is finally here.

I really wish it had happened earlier in the season so that I could have heard Michael Johns rock out with Mr. Diamond, but hey, I'll take what I can get.

Here's a recap of my requests:

David Cook: "Cracklin' Rose" or "Brother Love's Travelin' Salvation Show," rocker style
David Archuleta: please, PLEASE don't do one of the soulful ballads like "Hello Again," "I Am, I Said," or "Heartlight." How about "Forever in Blue Jeans"?*
Syesha: "You Don't Bring Me Flowers"
Brooke: "Song Sung Blue"
Jason Castro: "America" or "Shilo." Or "Red, Red Wine."

I had pegged Michael Johns for "Sweet Caroline," but since he's no longer on the show (stooopid voters!), I think that would also be a good choice for David A.

Neil is the summer concert at Fenway Park this year, on August 23. John's and my four-year anniversary is August 14. Tickets to Neil might just be my anniversary present to myself.

Idol Top 6: My Take (It or Leave It)

I'm really not an Andrew Lloyd Weber fan, so I was not excited about last night. And overall, after the performances, I remained not excited.

Syesha: Every week you surprise me by being good. Loved the red dress, loved the sass. I could totally see you on Broadway and hear you singing a Disney movie song.

David A.: Great, great, great. I don't know what Mr. Lloyd Weber and his purple cords were telling you about not singing with your eyes closed, though. I think it's fine if your eyes are closed. Of course, I think it would be fine if your eyes were open. Great performance, great voice. And nice Members Only-influenced jacket.

Brooke: Yikes, butterfly girl. I give you props for starting and stopping; I thought that was very brave. But that was not your kind of song, it's not your kind of music, and your nerves really showed. Bottom three.

Jason: Double yikes! That was just painful. And dude, seriously, do not admit that you didn't know that the musical Cats was about, well, CATS. What did you think it was about? Also: seeing as this was clearly not your genre, do not pick one of the most famous musical numbers of all time. Too much to live up to. Bottom three, I'm afraid.

Carly: Rock it, baby. I thought that was your best performance yet. You looked like you were having fun, you'd clearly managed to pull the stick out of your ass, and your vocals were great.

David C.: I didn't hear the same "red hot molten lava bomb" that Randy did, I'm afraid. I thought you were out of tune and out of your element, but I blame the genre. And maybe my ears, since the judges disagreed.

I feel almost certain that Brooke and Jason will be in the bottom three, but I'm not sure who the third will be. It's getting down to crunch time.

Funny Evening (Good Funny)

The twins and I had a great time yesterday evening, just doing the usual stuff. They helped me bring in the milk, they ate a good dinner (hummus, pretzels, fruit, Veggie Booty), they drank an insane amount of water out of their new Sigg bottles. They had a bath. Riley peed an ocean onto the floor after his bath, but got it all on the tile. Yay, Riley! We read stories. They went to bed without a peep of protest (but with a bunch of adorable chatter) for the first time in ages.

By 8:00 p.m., I had:

• changed into my pajamas and a sweatshirt
  
• washed up the twins' dishes and started the dishwasher
  
• gotten a load of laundry through the washing machine and into the dryer
  
• baked two loaves of banana bread (well, they were in the oven, at least)
  
• folded a load of laundry
  
• made myself some dinner

I then sat down with a generous glass of wine and my meal, and tuned in for the Idol results . . . which did not start until 9:00 p.m. No problem! I had planned to T-Tapp (be prepared for some crazy, infomercially-looking stuff if you click) after Idol, but just reversed my schedule and popped the video in to do before the show.

This was my first time Tapping, although I've had the videos for months. Like enough months to add up to a year. Or more. Ahem. Anyway. I Tapped away, drinking wine at the water breaks (Hey! Wine is mostly water!) and feeling really virtuous. And a little warm and flushed.

I had just finished up my exercise when the doorbell rang. Wha? It kind of freaked me out, until I realized that I had made plans for a friend of a friend who works for an HVAC company to come over and give me a quote on getting central air installed in my condo. Well. I'm wearing my pajamas, there's half-eaten dinner and half-consumed glass of wine on the table, and there is a slightly demented-looking and scantily clad exercise guru on my TV (at least it wasn't Richard Simmons). I let the (young, hipster-ish, twenty-something) guy in and got the TV turned off as quickly as possible. It was all rather amusing, at least to me. Mr. HVAC looked a little surprised by my attire (floral PJ bottoms and matching top), but c'est la vie, right?

The crowing glory of my evening was saying goodbye to Kristy Lee on Idol. Finally! Thank you, America! As one of my commenters said, no more sparkly tank tops!

On tonight's agenda? Another trip to Margaritaville. Woo-woo!

Idol Top 7: My Take (It or Leave It)

I was really skeptical about last night's show. I'm not a fan of her music, and I thought that the contestants were kind of being set up for failure. A friend summed it up best in an e-mail to me when she predicted that the comments would go something like this:

Randy: I don't know, man, it was just all right for me.

Paula: You look beautiful!

Simon: Bad choice of song. That song is too big for you. You just can't compare to Mariah.

To be sure, there was a lot of that (especially the beautiful comments from Paula [who, thank goodness, was not in danger of falling out of her top this week, although she did look like she was headed for the prom]). But overall I was pleasantly surprised by the performances.

Let's break it down.

David A.: OMG, were you wearing leather pants? Black leather pants? Seriously? You sang the heck out of that song, although it was a bit of the same ol', same ol'. The wardrobe change was nice and I love your voice, but I'm ready for you to break out of the mold.

Syesha: Talk about same ol', same ol' . . . every week you are good and every week there is nothing special about what you do. Bottom three.

Kristy Lee: Please go home, OK? I believe that Simon described you as wallpaper one week: just a little something nice in the background. I couldn't agree more. Is is me, or were you groping Ryan Seacrest and looking at him with googly eyes after your performance? Bottom three.

Carly: I liked the restraint at the beginning and I like that the eyes were not a-poppin'. I thought this was one of your best performances.

Brooke: You were charmingly nervous. I thought the acoustic vibe really worked, and in fact I've been listening to your performance on YouTube. I fear, though, that you could be in the bottom three.

David C.: I have to confess that last night I didn't really get this performance. But I've listened to it a few times this morning and it gave me chills. And the tears at the end! That felt genuine to me. You pretty much have this competition wrapped up and won.

Jason: I think Mariah was grossed out by your dreads. As for your performance, I'd eat poi to go to a luau where you perform. 

Here's David Cook's performance of "Always Be My Baby."

Ass-whoopings

I am currently getting my ass handily whooped in not one, but two games of Scrabulous. I am seriously rusty in the Scrabble department. Wow.

And speaking of asses and whoopings, I'd like to open up a big ol' can of whoop-ass on the Powers That Be for voting Michael Johns off of American Idol last week. The problem with my logic here is that I guess I need to open the can of whoop-ass on . . . myself and those like me for not voting.

Which leads me to something else unrelated to ass-whoopings, I've always wished that Idol voting was against someone rather than for someone. If I could vote to have my least favorite removed from the show, I'd be more likely to pick up the phone and dial. Am I the only one who feels this way?

Idol Top 8: My Take (It or Leave It)

[For those of you who are not Idol fans or who live outside the US and don't get Idol (gasp!), there's a more substantive and advice-seeking post below.]

Still reeling from the aftershocks that Neil was not on Idol last night, I was surprised to enjoy the show as much as I did. I felt like no one was great but no one was terrible. Also, I was so distracted by Paula's boobies that I had a hard time focusing on the singers!

Michael: Not your best. I must disagree with Paula: you looked better than you sounded. And what's up with the ascots? Two weeks running now with the ascots. Odd.

Syesha: You are always better than I think you'll be, but never sublime. Choosing a Fantasia song was not wise. Bottom three.

Kristy Lee: Why, oh why did America not get rid of you during Beatles week? Why? Now we are forced to endure sparkly tank tops and good but not great singing. Will this perhaps be your last time in the bottom three?

David C.: You suffered from having been so good for weeks running that this perfectly OK performance actually sounded pretty bad. Loved the hand sign at the end though. Inspired.

David A.: Thank you for not choosing "We Are the World." I was really fearful that you would do that to me, and that I would throw up a little in my mouth when you did. Instead, nice song and very solid performance.

Carly: What are you so mad about? Why can you not have fun? This whole Idol experience just seems really painful for you, which makes you hard to like even though I really want to. Bottom three.

Jason: Best of the night. Perfect song for you, and it takes a special guy to feel comfortable playing that little tiny ukulele in front of millions. The pants, though, still need work. And those white shoes! Dude, it looked like you were wearing cruise ships on your feet!

Brooke: Love the song. Would still love to be your friend, even if that performance was on the dull side.

Sweet Idol-ine

Neil Diamond night on Idol tonight! Oooh, I love me some Neil. This is very exciting.

Here's what I hope people do, keeping in mind that while I love Neil, I really only know the famous stuff:

David Cook: "Cracklin' Rose" or "Brother Love's Travelin' Salvation Show," rocker style

David Archuleta: please, PLEASE don't do one of the soulful ballads like "Hello Again," "I Am, I Said," or "Heartlight." How about "Forever in Blue Jeans"?*

Syesha: "You Don't Bring Me Flowers"

Michael Johns: "Sweet Caroline"

Brooke: "Song Sung Blue"

Jason Castro: "America" or "Shilo." Or "Red, Red Wine."

Carly Smithson: "Girl You'll Be a Woman Soon"

Kristy Lee: Honestly, I don't care, but for pure kitch value, how about "On the Robert E. Lee"?

*Looking through this list of Neil Diamond songs, I learned that in 1968, he recorded a tune called "The Pot Smoker's Song." I don't know it, but I think it would be hilarious if David A. sang that one! So not gonna happen.

Idol Top 9: My Take (It or Leave It)

This week was a little ho-hum for me. None of the performances really stood out as either horrific or sublime. Dolly is a hoot, though, isn't she?

Brooke: Not your best, but you're still my favorite of the women. I'm waiting for you to get in touch with me on Facebook . . .

David C.: Also not your best, but the haircut is such an improvement. Wow! 

Ramiele: Snooze. And shortalls? Shortalls? With gold stiletto boots? I know that I've documented my lack of fashion sense, but really: Who dresses you? Bottom three for you.

Syesha: Sitting on the piano was really, really cheesy. Another snoozer for me. Possible bottom three.

David A.: I cannot stop loving you, but I'm starting to feel like you're a one trick pony. The sentimental, heartfelt ballad is a genre you do well, but is that enough? Still, if I were a teenage girl, I'd totally want to go to prom with you.

Jason: The pants were marginally less tight this week. I think the reason I like you so much is that every week you take me back to my college coffeehouse days, and those are days I remember fondly.

Kristy Lee: This is your genre and you did it well, which annoys me because you really aren't very good and yet I think we'll be seeing you again next week. 

Carly: You kept the scary pop eyes under control, which I appreciated. I've already forgotten what you sang, though. Guess I didn't like it very much.

Michael: Best of the night, and best-looking, too. Yum, yum, yum.

Eze come . . .

Chikeze go.

I wish it had been Ramiele or the cowgirl, but I knew Chikeze wasn't going to last long.

Until next week, Idol . . .

Idol Top 10: My Take (It or Leave It)

[This week I will try to use a consistent voice. My post about Idol last week was an editorial nightmare!]

Ramiele: Snooze. But at least your hair didn't confuse me (although your outfit did). I think (hope?) we'll be saying goodbye to you this week.

Syesha: You keep getting better and better, and your elegant performance this week surprised me. Nice work! And I love your  hair.

Chikeze: You've got charm, but frankly I think you're the weakest singer among the men. You're in danger. I predict the bottom three for you tonight.

Brooke: I thought the song was great for you, and you are just so genuine. And pretty! I feel like we could be BFF. Shoot me an e-mail and I'll tell you how to find me on Facebook.

Michael: Your performance made me forget the performances that had come before you. And dude, you are just so HOT.

Jason: The pants, the pants, the pants! They are still too tight! You are the male version of Brooke, though, with your honesty, charm, and genuine-ness. Was it just me or was there something weird going at the the beginning of your song, though? Until you started grooving with the Spanish, I had a hard time hearing your vocals.

Carly: You appeared to have a stick up your ass during that entire performance. I'm sorry; that must have been very uncomfortable.

David A.: I love you, I really do. But your youth is starting to show and dude, you need to drop the goody-two-shoes routine. Let your hair down! Do something crazy! Drop an f-bomb! (OK, maybe not the last one, but you get the idea.)

Kristy: That song makes me feel a little ill, and I think it was manipulative of you to choose it. It was a fine performance, but as boring as usual. 

David C.: They saved the best for last this week. You were amazing. You were so amazing that anyone reading this who did not see it needs to check it out. Thank you, YouTube:

EDITED: I was so curious about this version of "Billie Jean" that it finally occurred to me to do some sleuthing about Chris Cornell. You all probably know this already, but Chris Cornell was the lead singer of Soundgarden and Audioslave. His June 2007 solo album includes his acoustic cover of "Billie Jean." Here's a version from YouTube:

Idol: My Take (It or Leave It)

Amanda: She's just not my type. And the skunk hair has to go. But I liked how she interacted with the judges after her performance, which, of course, has nothing to do with how well she sings.

David A.: He's back! Awesome. I don't think he can top "Imagine," but he did himself proud with "Long and Winding Road." Now I want to see him rock something up-tempo.

The Cowgirl, I mean, Kristy? Christy? Katie? I can't get her name: Snooze. She gets the boot. I want to like her because she's from Oregon, but she's too boring and bad.

Michael Johns: I thought the performance was so-so, but even so-so, he's SO SO SEXY. He can turn me on anytime. And, although I might be biased, I think he's better than that performance.

Brooke: Please contain the "Woooooooooo!" next time. I really like you, but no more dancing. No wooooos. Please. Thank you.

David Cook: I think he's great. The voice box thing did not work for me--seemed gimmicky. But every time he hits the stage, I enjoy the show.

Mr. Dreads: Your pants are too tight. Every week. Including this week. Please, get some looser pants. Despite the pants, Simon's right: you are charming.

Carly: You scared me with the eyes. Pop eyes! Eeeeeeeek! Scary pop eyes! I love "Blackbird," though, and thought you were great when I wasn't too busy being freaked out.

Syesha: Your performance totally surprised me by being so good. I think it was better than you really are, actually.

Chikeze: I don't really get Chikeze, and I did not get this performance. The slow part was really weird. And the honkey-tonk part was overdone. And if you don't play an instrument, THAT'S OK. No need to start now!

Ramiele: Your hair confuses me every week. You are small and cute. And boring. If the cowgirl doesn't go, you do.