09 November 2009

Very Superstitious

I have accepted an offer on my condo.

I signed the offer on Sunday, and those of you who are Facebook friends with me likely already know this rather gigantic piece of news. And while yes, it is in fact a huge piece of very exciting news that I want to sing from the rooftops and use as an excuse to buy champagne by the case, I suffer from superstition about saying it out loud too many times.

It was the same when I was in the interview process for the job at Reed. Things were going well, it was on my mind all the time, I wanted to tell people about it and benefit from their good wishes, but I was nervous. I felt like talking about it too much would jinx it somehow, prevent that next call from coming in, knock me out of the running. Talking about it was like pretending it was real when it wasn't, or something. Or maybe it was just self-preservation.

You see, the more people I told about the job the more people I'd have to tell if it didn't work out, and the more I talked about it the more I wanted it, thus making the potential disappointment of not getting it more acute. I have a lot of experience with sharing bad news, and I don't enjoy it. Every time I share the news, I have to relive the bad feelings again. It can be exhausting, so keeping things close until they are real can be a way to shield myself from some of the post-event damage.

The condo deal is more likely to become a reality than the Reed job was. I have a signed contract. The buyer is preapproved for the loan. As far as I know, the condo is in great shape and should pass inspection with flying colors. But. But. But. Something could come up at the inspection. Or the financing could fall through. Or the buyer could just change his mind. Until all the documents are signed at the close and the money has been transferred to my mortgage holder, I can't be as excited as I want to be. But I'm also too excited to keep the news to myself.

I'm trying hard not to think about how much money I'm losing in this deal and trying hard to focus on how much the sale of the condo will improve my cash flow. Frankly, given how poor my cash flow situation has been of late, it's been pretty easy to keep my thoughts in the right place for now.

I'm cautiously optimistic, extremely excited, and already spending my additional monthly income. First two orders of business? A trip back east to see my Boston friends and a big ol' party for all the people in Portland with whom I'm so happy to be sharing this city.

Closing date: December 11. Thirty-two days 'til the really, really, REALLY happy post.

22 comments:

Lyndsay said...

That's awesome Snick - congratulations! My fingers are crossed that all the details unfold uneventfully!

amy said...

WONDERFUL news and hoping it is only a matter of time before the sale is complete, FINI!

Christie said...

Congrats! Let's get some champagne to celebrate at the next Yummy Group dinner. :)

Pop and Ice said...

That's absolutely wonderful news! I happy for you.

Lauren said...

Congratulations Snick.
I totally understand how you feel about the superstitious thing. I was the same way when I found out I was pregnant (and with many many other things that have happened in my life).
Think positive thoughts, it will all work out how it is meant to.

julie said...

yahooooooooooo - good things are meant to be - bask in it!
very happy for you!

Goddess in Progress said...

Ooh, that's awesome news! Fingers crossed for the next 30-ish days. :-)

Angela said...

I'm the exact same way, I can be very superstitious...so, I'll just whisper a good luck to you. Oh, and I'll rub my rabbit's foot for you, while I keep my fingers and eyes crossed, while throwing salt over my shoulder.

Amanda said...

Yay! I'm the same way about sharing news about things I really, really want. It's very stifling not to be able to talk about it, but really terrifying to actually say it out loud.

beyond said...

i understand your reluctance about sharing (potential) very good news, i am the same way for certain important things.
congrats on the (almost) house sale!

Sonya said...

Such good news!

I agree with you about being afraid to let the news, any news, out. I've also kept things close to the chest in order to protect myself. I'm sure there's a deep psychological reasoning behind it.

Susan said...

Great news Snick....your right, don't concentrate on the loss....glad your getting it off your hands. One stress down....on to number 2 =)

Single Parent Dad said...

Good luck Snick, I am not sure how house sales work in the US, but if you were here you would be right to be cautious. When I got rid of our marital home, I never felt secure with the deal until I saw the money.

Crash Course Widow said...

Did I miss this news on FB earlier this week?? I can't remember...so I must have missed it. ;o)

CONGRATULATIONS!!! I'm keeping all my fingers and toes crossed that it goes smoothly for you!! And I soooooooooo get the superstitious thing. I know I do it myself too since being widowed. I've yet to figure out why I do it. I think it's often in a generally failing attempt to not get myself too excited or my hopes built up too much, so I won't be too crushed if it doesn't work out. But I've seemed to become a pessimistic survivalist in some ways...and I don't really like it either, since it's most definitely NOT how I was before Charley died.

For me, I've found that I do still think occasionally about the money I lost with the most recent house sale, but it's more just as an accepted, footnote fact. It doesn't eat away at me or anything. Sure, it would have been nice to have that extra $35k or $100k that I lost...but in the end, my sanity and happiness is far more important than any price tag. I don't regret selling my house one second.

Good luck, my friend!!!

MDT said...

Congrats! I am completely the same way about potential good news. The more I talk about it the more worked up I get and the more people I'll potentially be disappointing. Plus the whole jinxing thing. Yep, right there with you. But it worked out, hooray!

Katherine said...

YAY, Snick, for getting a contract on the condo and fingers crossed for nothing eventful until the closing is DONE!!

And, as usual, you said so well how I feel about sharing bad news, and having to relive the feelings. A few short weeks after my husband died of pancreatic cancer, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. And I just COULD NOT TALK ABOUT IT. And so many people didn't understand. I got a lot of comments about how "I know you're just such a private person," when that is not at all true of me--I typically blab about EVERY LITTLE FREAKIN' THING. But it's wearying to have to continue to share bad news, and have people console you, and bear up under all that. Sometimes it is just easier NOT TO SAY IT in the first place.

So, I understand. But am so glad you shared the news with your virtual friends here.

Jill said...

FABULOUS! Since I personally do not believe that being happy causes the universe to take the good stuff away from us, I will now do a little happy dance for you around my kitchen. (Though I do understand your need for caution).

YAY!

letterstoelias said...

Great news Snick - And though it wasn't on the level of a house sale or job, I was the same on the second go around for the appointment for getting my memorial tattoo for my husband.

The first appointment I blabbed about, and then it had to be cancelled because my daughter was still nursing . . . . oops! The second appointment I barely told anyone about 'just in case', but all went as planned and I got a beautiful tattoo in memory of my Elias.

I sure hope all goes as planned with the condo for you.

~C~

OTRgirl said...

WhoooHOOOO! That's awesome. I totally hear you on the fear of the jinx though... Can't wait to see the final post about the sale.

Crash Course Cardiologist said...

Congrats... that's awesome!!! :-) Hope all goes smoothly from this point forward!

Supa Dupa Fresh said...

I'm very happy for you and strongly believe in cracking open the champers (bottle o' the widow Cliquot see-voo-play) even if one ends up with a hangover.

Voila, bravo, and touche! (Whatever French words one says for good stuff).

X

Supa

Christine said...

Hooray! I think things are loosening up in the Boston real estate market in general, and here's more proof. Wishing you luck!

Also: I too am on FB. Wanna be friends?