My dad is in town visiting and he was kind enough to babysit last night so that I could go out with some friends and see Knocked Up.
I love, love, love going to the movies, and it was fun to get some grown-up time with my friends. The movie was funny and I had a good time seeing many of the cast members of Freaks & Geeks in non-high school roles.
Here's what bugged me. You knew something was coming, right? No spoilers, I promise. The female lead, Alison, lives with her sister and brother-in-law. The brother in law has a rather gloomy view of marriage; he feels trapped and like marriage has made his life stale. I know people feel that way about marriage, and I know this was just a movie. But I loved being married. Adored it. Adored my husband. Would give anything to be married again. I hate it when this stereotype of marriage as some kind of end of your youth, end of your hipness, end of all things fun gets perpetuated. Especially when one of the complaints is that "my wife loves me too much." It's not like it was an abusive relationship or there was some other dire problem, this character was just bored.
Just a movie, a comedy to boot. It's just hard to listen to people, even fictional ones, bitch about being bored with being married.
Also: the birth scene? Totally made me cry. Tiny baby! I wanted to just jump into that movie screen and cuddle the sweet thing.
Moi
- Snickollet
- I'm a mother and a widow, and a whole lot of other things. Here, though, I tend to write about parenting, grief, and their intersection.
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19 comments:
I'm like you. I LOVE being married. My life is so much more full than when I was (young) single and traveling!
There is a lot of whining in this world ... don't you think?
BTW, I love going to the movies too but haven't been to one in about ....17 months. lol I actually like going to movies by myself.
I also think being married rocks. I wish my husband and I had taken the plunge years ago, but we were all 'new-age it doesn't matter about a piece of paper' for a while. I *like* the piece of paper, damnit!
As for the movie, I rarely fork out $$ to see things in the cinema, but for this one I just might.
That was me with too many typos. What I was trying to say was,
While not married legally, through no fault of my own, I love having a spouse. Maybe someday all people will enjoy the privilege of enjoying all the rights. I don't miss my single days at all, as much as I enjoyed them then.
I really enjoyed that movie too. Light weight and entertaining. I found it a tad crude in the beginning and thought it was going to be a stinker but the more I got to like the characters the better it got. I too loved the end, sigh.
I wanna bitch slap those complainers for you.
I know what you mean, Snick, about that movie. Paul Rudd's character annoyed the crap out of me -- so whiny. I just celebrated my fifth anniversary and have been with my husband for almost eight years. I can honestly say being married is the best thing that ever happened to me.
And I too burst into tears when the baby came out.
STILL haven't had a chance to see that movie! But I have to agree with you...marriage is wonderful. I LOVE being married. I only wish you had experienced it for much, much longer.
you labeled this post "a whole lot of nothing" - but I actually think it was a whole lot of sumpin" in that post if you really think about it.
People love to complain about things they really shouldn't be complaining about in the big scheme of things.
I really enjoyed the movie and yes, the brother-in-law was a pathetic whiner, I agree it's annoying when the stereotypical bad (boring)marriage is portrayed, because as we all know marriage is supposed to be filled with witty repartee, constant mind blowing sex and endless hours of couple time....yeah, right.
I also love being married and we're celebrating our 15th anniversary in two days, God, I feel old!
helo...
new reader here o_o
you have a very inspiring story. i think i will have to keep up with your blog from now on.
i know what you mean, being married is great. we have been going strong for almost 4 years and i can't wait for many more.
take care
What about the sister's character, she was over the top in her complaints about her husband. I'm glad I'm not the only one annoyed by their characters.
Judi
Honestly, I thought the sister was worse than the guy. She twisted everything he said into something awful and made life seem like a living nag fest. I didn't blame him for complaining...
Overall the movie felt fairly simplistic, but enjoyable.
I do agree with your basic point though. In the last couple years I think Jrex and I have come to love being married, but we had some really rocky years. It's definitely been hard work, but worth it in the end (or in the new beginning, I hope).
Lurker here, just wanted to say that I was very pleasantly surprised by Knocked Up; I thought it would be the same jokes from every other pregnancy film but it was really inventive, and I felt I knew someone like each of the characters. As for the sister and brother-in-law, I didn't feel like they were perpetuating that negative marriage stereotype (and I also can't stand that stereotype)--I saw it more as a very common situation where problems exist in the marriage, but no one is talking about them and they escalate.
bec :D
i totally agree. during the entire movie, i was so frustrated with their portrayal of married life. marriage ROCKS and i couldn't imagine someone NOT wanting to experience how wonderful it can be. there were some funny parts to the movie, but i don't think i came out of there feeling good about myself or wanting to recommend it to anyone else.
I thought Knocked Up was funny, but I guess I'm with OTRgirl because I blamed a lot of their problems on the woman. I couldn't see why she was always so angry at him. Right now I like being married, but we've had our share of tough times too. What was strange was that the couple in the movie had no real problems, yet couldn't seem to see how good they had it.
Glad you got out. I don't go to the movies nearly as often as I should.
I'm late to the party, but thanks for voicing my own feelings so well. I HATE folks who complain about marriage, spouses, etc. I know that had I been lucky enough to have my husband around, we would have had some huge disagreements, angry moments, etc., but I am with you--being married was the best thing I have ever done (and YT, I can't tell you how angry I am that not every loving couple has the option of that protective legal contract).
Even before being widowed, I really hated the double-standard of (hetero) marriage: for girls, it's supposed to be the be-all and end-all of personal fulfillment, finding a man to love and serve, and who will validate your femininity and attractiveness and allow you to begin your *true* calling of making babies. Meanwhile, for men, all the rituals are designed to lament the "loss" of promiscuity--the fact that, "Dude, you only get to sleep with ONE woman from now on." I find the rituals preceding marriage really, really troubling from that standpoint--the girls starve themselves and nest, the boys "sow their wild oats" (or is it "sew"?)
P.S. I used "girls" on purpose, to imply that these standards permeate the consciousness of little girls long before they become women who get married. But I don't see that same super-early indoctrination of little boys, although perhaps that's because I don't have one.
new reader here :-) haven't seen the movie yet, but i will say i love being married. even when i was in high school, i knew that i couldn't wait to be married. granted, this is helped by the fact that i married someone who is most definitely the perfect match to my crazy personality, but still. i also want to say how inspirational your blog has been. i'm reading old posts and can't even imagine how much you've been through in the past year. my thoughts are with you and i'm totally rooting for you to come out on top through all this.
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