I'm on our company's holiday party planning committee. I don't mind. It's a fun group of coworkers (despite incident described below), and I like the holiday party. But I could have done without this exchange yesterday:
[blah blah blah restaurant blah games blah blah Yankee swap blah]
J (married mom of three): Will spouses be invited to the party?
R (30s, single, bitter about it): Who cares? I don't have a spouse. I don't even have a boyfriend.
L (20s, single, party girl): I don't either!
R: At least last year I had a boyfriend to bring to the party.
L: I can't remember who I was dating last year . . .
Me (trying to bite tongue, trying, trying, failing): Well, last year, I had a a husband.
SILENCE.
Seriously, they deserved that. I hope they felt BAD.
Moi
- Snickollet
- I'm a mother and a widow, and a whole lot of other things. Here, though, I tend to write about parenting, grief, and their intersection.
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35 comments:
Good for you! They did deserve it. I'm sure they won't so thoughtless next time.
Yay on you Snick! I'm guessing their silence meant they realized what insensitive asses they had been. And I hope they were mortified with their behavior.
yay, snick! you go, girl!
Ouch! That sounds like a painful conversation, but good for you!
Oh boy. Good for you. It is so interesting what other people's "problems" are - and how they don't seem like problems at all.
What a complete bunch of ass-hats! Good for you and your biting wit!
i say let it out. boo on them for not being very sensitive about the situation!
They were careless. They probably won't be next time. Sorry you had to endure that.
Jesus what immature little bitches they are!! It sounds to me like this is a committee deciding on a party for themselves, not the rest of the office. Don't you just love your 20's hahahaha???
Ooh! That was a good one (on your part).
Good on you. SOmetimes it feels better to let rip!
J
Heh. I enjoy the occasional jab at people who really need it, too. For instance, when someone is all "aaaaarrgh! Little Johnny has to get TUBES in his ears and this one ENT group is supposed to be the best but it's not in-network and OMG general anesthesia WHIIIINE" and I go "Ooo. Bummer. My kids' specialists have said they can't help us anymore and suggest we go to a major teaching hospital, and CHOP is the best but Duke is closer, whattayathink?" Sometimes people need a little reality check.
Rock on, sister! Be a little more sensitive, ladies, willya??
Damn straight they deserved it. Maybe they will remember to think of who they are talking to next time. Urgh!
The deserved it so bad. Maybe next time they will think before whining.
I'm glad you spoke up. You'd have regretted not saying . . . the truth. I'm sure they're going to store that information, and it shouldn't happen twice. People forget . . . it happens. So good that you spoke up, and can move on.
That there was silence is a good sign. It shows they were appropriately contrite.
I mean, truly, they needed the wake up call.
Kathleen
They absolutely deserved it. Good for you.
Well deserved comeback. Ouch.
Wow!
Once gain, I am just in awe of you.
Good for you!
Yesssssssssssssss! I love it when you get sassy. People who live in their own sterilized bubbles deserve to have those suckers popped every once in a while.
All wrapped up in their own lives, R and L were being insensitive to you as well as to J, who posed the question, just by their attitude toward committed relationships. “Who cares?” – not nice at all.
Good on you, mate! They TOTALLY deserved it!
good on you for your opinion you are entitled to it, but what did it prove. sounds hard but you are not the only one to have ever lost a loved one. I salute you in bringing up your twins and for trying to pick up the pieces but it's not always about the "one who lost a loved one". the fact that there was silence from the rest of the ladies at that time explains. Have sympathy for the one that said she doesn't have a boyfriend/lover/partner. It's better to have loved than not loved at all. I love reading your blog Snickollet.
ouch. They could be a bit more careful. I'm sorry. I hope they do remember now.
Good for you! Maybe next time they will remember to have some tact!
I'm going to go with, "Serves them right."
Wow anonymous. That's a whole lot of nasty to be spewing at someone who lost her husband a mere 6 months ago.
Seriously. Not that this a grief competition, but it is safe to say that not having a Saturday night date is trumped by watching your spouse die and leaving you a widow at 35 with 2 small children. For you to even attempt to compare the two is RIDICULOUS.
Suzanne
Anon--
I have sympathy for my coworkers. It's just that their comments did not show any sympathy for me. They were disrespectful, and I let them know.
-snickollet
I teared up a little, because I was just so proud to see you not let that one just slip by.
"Party planning committee?" Do you watch "The Office"? There's ALL kinds of drama on the party planning committee.
I'm glad for you that you said it. Sometimes it's good to let it out.
Awesome. There are very few times when that urge is both justified and appropriate. You waited for your moment and you got one. I wish you had a picture of their faces.
Good job.
And anonymous? Sorry you're lonely, but don't take it out on Snick here, 'kay? She wasn't rude, she was truthful.
Widow "humor." I get it. I make it. Eff 'em all.
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