12 November 2007

Toddlers: The Ugly

Is it me, or do all parents of toddlers feel like they spend a lot of time yelling and/or saying, "No!"?

28 comments:

Veronica said...

Uh, yep. All the time. I am hoping it gets easier as she gets bigger.

Karyn said...

Sounds like you've had a day!

My two year old doesn't say "no", he says "nonononononono". It sounds like one long word. Clearly that must be what I sound like.

We've been trying to stop using the word as well as to not react beyond the simple correction or distraction to stop a behavior. It sounds good on paper but is it ever difficult to implement.... I think the book is called Parenting Young Children?

Hugs.

teki said...

I spent my days constantly using the phrase "stop please" when my kid was small. Thankfully it will pass!

OTR sister said...

All of us.

And it does get better as they get older. Or at least you can give more explanation while saying no. And they can tell you WHY they want to do that behavior (and sometimes it is a good reason).

When my daughter was in her "no, no, no!" phase, my father-in-law heard me telling her "no!" and said, "so that is where she gets it." Grrr. He had a point but not a very helpful one.

Shelly Kang said...

Yes, and anyone who claims otherwise is either lying or has some kind of extremely docile freak of nature. Remember at this age, it is best to try to find something else to distract them with, and the more childproofing you can do the easier your life will be - let the latches and gates say "no" for you so that you get to be the good guy.

kim said...

Yep. We're now moving out of the distraction phase and into the "I'll trade you (insert activity) if you (insert request)" phase. Ain't toddlers grand?

Anonymous said...

I have a 9, 12 and 15 year old.

No will never leave your vocab. Get over it!

janet said...

my oldest thought "no" was part of his name.

yeah, it's always like this!

Rev Dr Mom said...

It's not just you.

And it's not just toddlers... :)

J said...

I've had plenty of days when I feel like the "'No' Monster." Plenty and then some.

Hang in there.

Momma Mary said...

Just today I begged my son to do something I could cheer for, rather than being the 8 armed "captain destruct-o" he was being. I really wanted to say something other than "No-No. No. No. Mommy said NO. STOP PLEASE. SIT DOWN. You cannot do that. It isn't nice..." You are NOT alone!

Amy said...

No is no and yes, remember saying it far too frequently than I liked when my twins were the age yours are. Part of the territory I am afraid.

Do what you can to remove dangers, make the house as kid proof as you can. It helps.

MJ said...

Hate to tell you this but I seem to spend a lot of time saying no with six-year-olds. I just say "no" to different things. (No. Let me pour the boiling water from the kettle. No. You may not have Halloween candy for breakfast. No. By after breakfast I meant several hours after breakfast not 30 seconds.)

Michele (Moosh) said...

NO!!!!

Oh wait, said that out of habit. ;-)


YES!!!!! It's not just you!!!

Emmie (Better Make It A Double) said...

You bet. I hate it, especially the yelling. I'm trying to stop yelling, but finding it much harder than I thought it would be. I don't say awful mean things or anything, but I yell louder than I should sometimes and regret it when I do... While I'm confessing, I should add that I also never hit them, but I do feel like it sometimes. My big trigger is fear - if they do something that truly scares me for their safety, I get really mad. Working on that. Anyway, you're not alone.

amy said...

i actually made up a song to sing to them about it: (sung to the tune of "My Fair Lady"

"The Nopee song, the nopee song, I love the nopee song.

Nopee song, nopee song

Nopee song."

My kids are 17, 15 and 13. When they ask me for money or to drive them somewhere, "nopee" is still my response. Then we all sing.

Of course, they would also counter with the "yepee" song. Same tune.

Klynn said...

Toddlers, teenagers..."no, no, no...I said NO!" I'm surprised I don't say that to Bob every once in a while.

What gets me is when I tell Boog "no" and he grabs whatever he wasn't supposed to...grins at me...then takes off running and giggling. Then he acts like he doesn't understand why he gets a pop on the bottom accompanied by the "I said NO!" phrase, when I catch him. Urg.

With the teenager, it's more yelling and elaborating on the "no" than just saying "no". It's also a lot of reminding her that Bob and I are the parents, and she is still a child (not Boog's extra parent, and not an independent adult).

Let's see...Boog is 3 1/2...that means I have at least 14 1/2 more years of this "no" song and dance. Sigh. You aren't alone.

Catizhere said...

All day long.
That's one of the reasons it's the first word they learn.

django's mommy said...

Oh, yeah. Allllll the time.

Wait until they start yelling 'godDAMNit, Mommy!'... yeah. Worst. Mom. Ever.

Melany aka Supermom said...

Oh yes. After the word "mom" this is the word most used in our home

Magpie said...

Um, that would be every toddler ever invented?

Amy said...

"NO" was my best friend when the twins were toddlers. What really helped was having certain rooms completely kid-proof and the use of baby gates!

Becky said...

In a word: yes.

Makes you feel like an ogre, doesn't it?

uberimma said...

Yeah. And it only gets worse.

Lugosi said...

You think you're saying "no" a lot now? Just wait till they're 15.

Mama Nabi said...

... is there any other word they like? :-)

B.E.C.K. said...

I remember saying no a lot, but I also eventually adopted a "mostly good" approach to behavior. If the kiddo was being mostly good, I let some things slide. Of course, if he was running for the street, all bets were off. Raising kids is such a weird thing; by the time we feel we've mastered one stage, we're on to the next. ;^)

Anonymous said...

OMG! YES! My daughter will be 3 in January and I wonder what happened to her mama - the one that couldn't imagine ever being annoyed by her. Now, most days, I feel like a really bad mama. Where has my patience gone? I mean, I know she tests my buttons and is bit bratty b/c of her age but still! It's so hard.